when it comes to our phones, we should be controlling social media, not the other way around. think about how you can get value from your socials. social media is not going away, so having a good relationship with it is essential.

1. do something without your phone once a day –

really make the effort to indulge in something without your phone whether that’s cuddling with your dog, making your coffee or making your bed. you’ll really enjoy it more and it allows you to think. “how am i feeling today? what have i got going on?”. you’re aware and more focused. i used to bring my phone on my morning walks with my dog to snap a couple cute pictures of him then i realized it was taking away from our time together. it’s much better to be present with him and myself.

2. make a conscious effort to not go on social media until later in the day – 

before, i was not feeling my best when i would go on Instagram right away. it was taking over me. i was getting way too much information within minutes of waking up. i found it exhausting.  now, i won’t go on Instagram until way later when my morning routine and morning to-do list is done. you do have to be very disciplined about this. when you forget about social media, you can prepare for the day ahead and have an exact plan of what you want to do on that day. you’re not letting your own life take a back seat. you will feel so good. i swear by this.

3. understand that people are sharing mostly good stuff (as we should) –

we see a lot of the good stuff that goes on social media but there’s a lot of difficult moments in life. things that people don’t put online. i don’t think social media is necessarily about portraying this perfect life but about sharing the joys of life that each of us experience. it’s about moments that really capture your heart that you want to remember it in the most perfect way.  

4. have a good mentality –  

if you don’t have the right mentality, social media is a killer for your happiness. it can make you compare yourself to everyone else. there’s always someone out there that is eating at a Michelin restaurant, driving a luxury car or traveling around the world. if you compare yourself, it becomes a negative thing where you start to feel jealous or resentment. social media then becomes an exhausting place to be. 

if you use social media as inspiration or to figure out what is possible for you, then it’s an amazing place to be. the intention of social media is to not let what other people are doing stress you out. you might see someone who has something that you admire, a job that you really like or a way of life or attitude that you would like. this is a good way to be influenced because you can try to implement that in your own life.

5. more in person interactions-

if a friend reaches a milestone in their life, it’s easy to type in a text and say congratulations but it’s better to take them out to coffee or lunch to congratulate them. or if a friend has a baby, what we should do is go over and bring them food/snacks. these things are hard because it takes your time but it leaves you feeling really connected to the other person. it’s not bad to say congratulations but it’s not always giving you what you need. it’s not as meaningful as showing up. focus on maintaining your real-life relationships.